Take Your Time
"It usually takes about six weeks for the vagina and pelvic organs to return to close to their pre-pregnancy state," explains Dr. Lissa Rankin, an OB-GYN and mom of one in San Francisco and author of What's Up Down There? Questions You'd Only Ask Your Gynecologist if She Was Your Best Friend. "If there was a tear, episiotomy, or C-section, six weeks is when we expect complete healing."
For some moms, even that can feel way too soon. "Most of us are exhausted, leaking from multiple body parts, and far too busy keeping this very small, vulnerable person alive to even think about sex," says Jenna McCarthy, a mom of two in Santa Barbara, California, and author of The Parent Trip: From High Heels and Parties to Highchairs and Potties. "And frankly, raging hormones and ravaged nether-regions aren't generally conspiring to make a gal feel her sexy best." Meanwhile, your sex drive may be taking a permanent detour for quite some time. "Which isn't to say you can't have or won't enjoy sex. You just might need some (OK, a lot) of extra warming up," McCarthy says. "But if what you really crave is a nap, that's OK, too."
Tip: Have Great Sex (Even With Yourself)
"A celibate mommy is not a happy one," says Dr. Rankin. If you're feeling a hint of a spark, but are still a little weirded out by your post-delivery lady parts, "do some exploring solo."