I was born on December 22nd, 2002 at 2:26am. My birthplace was supposed to be our home, in a lovely warm birthing tub in the living room, but Mommy's uterus spilled water everywhere and then refused to contract, so she had to zoom off to the Greater Niagara General Hospital to be pumped full of a nifty drug called Oxytocin. This made her uterus get down to business so that she could start pushing me out!
Mommy wasn't happy about having to be at the hospital, but except for a nasty, nasty doctor that we'll call "Dr. Yuckypants", she has to admit that it wasn't a bad experience. After being peeled off the ceiling from the initial exam by the afore-mentioned Doctor, she played Scrabble and sang old Girl Guide songs with Daddy and the midwife Anne, who was there to help her out.
She also lolled around in a whirlpool bathtub, which really helped her handle all the contractions. She wanted to go drug free, but did finally accept a single shot in the bottom of a drug called Nubain, which helped to relax her so that she could handle the pain better. It relaxed her so much, in fact, that she had a lot of trouble keeping her eyes focused when people were talking to her!
Mommy's actual labour started at about 5 p.m. with the Oxytocin, and progressed well. About midnight, she started feeling the urge to push, and so she got out of the nice water and up onto the bed. Pushing lasted about two hours, in various positions, but the one that worked the best was with Mommy's upper torso off the side of the bed in Daddy's arms, and her lower torso half on its side, half on its back with her left leg up.
Mommy admits to having a moment or three of despair, where she begged Anne the midwife to just "cut it out, I can't do this anymore". Anne promptly threatened to call Dr. Yuckypants, who already didn't like Mommy's attitude and Mommy hated her right back. Needless to say, after a glare that could kill, Mommy got down to business and eventually, I slithered out!
I had to be a little difficult about my birth, of course. I decided that I simply HAD to hold onto my cord as I came out, causing poor Mommy to tear a wee bit. My head didn't cause her problems - it was my shoulders and my fist holding my cord at my chest! I also had to be different, in that I had done so many somersaults in Mommy's stomach way back when there was room, that I had a true knot in my cord! It caused quite a stir in the room - as if I, myself, wasn't enough excitement for everyone!
They put gunk in my eyes, which I did NOT like and then wrapped me up and put a silly blue and pink hat on me. Then, they gave me to Mommy and I liked that a little better, but I still wanted to voice my displeasure by crying for four hours. Finally Anne took me out of the room to cuddle me so that poor, exhausted Mommy and Daddy could have an hour or two's sleep before going home, four hours after my triumphant entrance into the world!