The Surrogacy Experience: Adjusting to New Life (Part 3 of 3)
Telling the Twins
Part of this is because of the emotional preparation both sides made. Karen says that she went into the surrogacy arrangement fully knowing about the possibility of awkward situations following the birth. “I thought I would want to see the twins more, but they’re her babies and I don’t want to overstep my boundaries,” says Karen.
“I do get emotional about them, like thinking about how my daughter hugged and kissed my belly,” admits Karen. “Thinking about what we went through the last year and not having them with me now can be sad.”
Overall, though, the experience is one that the friends look back on with positive feelings.
Dege Russell says that the relationship with Tom and Karen Holmes is going great. “I think it brought us even closer,” he says.
“Everybody asked us about Karen giving us our children after the birth,” shares Dege. “I have known Karen and Tom for too long to even worry about it. Our children will be just as much a part of their family as our family.”
When Callie and Talen are old enough to understand, their parents are going to tell them exactly how much of a miracle they are. When Karen got pregnant with the Russells’ babies, Karen and Tom explained the situation to their three children. They understood right away.
Kelly says that they will use basic terms when explaining their birth to Callie and Talen. “We’re going to tell them that mommy had a problem with her belly, so the doctor took the babies and put them in Aunt Karen’s belly until they were big enough to come out,” she says.
As for the lasting connection and appreciation Kelly and Dege feel for Tom and Karen, Karen says that no thanks are needed. “I’m glad I did it for Kelly and Dege. I have no doubt that this is what I was meant to do: I was meant to give them their children,” Karen says. “All I wanted to do is give them a family to love. I can see it in their eyes when they look at their children. All I see is love. They are great parents. Dege and Kelly are the ones who created Callie and Talen’s lives. I just helped their dream come true.”
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