Your TTC Strategy 6: Separate Fertility Myths from Fact

Fact: Becoming pregnant is not like getting that promotion at work or saving money to buy a house—results are not proportional to the effort, whether it is on your own or with medical intervention. It is more like gambling in Las Vegas, except that you have a better chance at success with conceiving.

If you want more control over the situation, you and your partner need to determine how much time, emotional turmoil, expense, and medical intervention you are willing to allow for conception.

Fact: Fertility problems can emerge at any age, any time, even if you have conceived in the past. The term secondary infertility is used to describe couples who have previously achieved a pregnancy, but who have not been able to achieve a consecutive pregnancy. The range of reasons for secondary infertility is nearly as extensive as primary infertility.

Fact: Adoption is a wonderful way to build a family and many couples choose that route if they experience infertility—and even if they don't. When a pregnancy follows, it is, understandably, a delightful surprise and gets lots of attention but, truthfully, it is not a cure for infertility. The reality is that only about 5 percent of couples who adopt later become pregnant.

Fact: The same factors that were present before the success are very likely to still exist. Conditions affecting the female such as uterine or tubal damage, ovarian dysfunction, or endometriosis, or sperm factors in the male may well impede conception again and require specialized care. In addition, age will have increased and may pose an additional concern.

Fact: The truth is that in vitro fertilization (IVF) is expensive but many couples find that there are acceptable ways to manage the costs. Sometimes health insurance will pay a part of the fees; there are low interest loans available; and some couples just choose to save until the money is banked for this very special use. Some IVF programs offer a refund or free cycles after a first unsuccessful one.

Whether and how to pursue medical treatment to get pregnant is a decision a couple must make together with full information.