Parental Etiquette

No one likes a know-it-all. And parents of young children have a particular antipathy toward this kind of person.

It's natural to have the urge to offer your own experiences and advice to a fellow parent (like what I'm doing with this very article). You want to help. You want to use your mistakes as an educational experience for others.

Resist the urge unless you're directly asked for your input. Unsolicited advice makes people crazy. What's worse is advice doled out with a tone of moral superiority. (Think: "You give your baby regular baby food? I've read that that stuff is loaded with chemicals and preservatives and causes cancer. Gotta go organic. If you love your baby, it's the only way.")

Yeah, I almost always think that my way of doing things is the best for my children. Every parent does. But I am routinely seeking counsel from other moms to see how they deal with situations, what products they like, how they discipline. I take an informal survey of what a variety of people think and then make my best, educated decision.

What I can't stand are those people who think that I am hapless and tell me how to do everything from dealing with my teething baby to my feuding four-year-olds. I haven't yet come up with a smart, sassy retort to these intrusions on my parenting. By the time I come up with one, I'll likely be a grandmother.