In the Baby Zone (Again!) with Ali Landry
When we caught up with actress and TV personality Ali Landry in fall 2012, she and her husband, film director Alejandro Monteverde, had just welcomed a son, Marcelo Alejandro, who joined big sister Estela Ines, born in 2007. What’s new in Ali’s life these days? For starters, a new baby! Entering the final days of her third trimester, the busy mom told us what’s different now that her brood is expanding again (she’s expecting another boy!), what’s stayed the same, and why having three kids has given her such an unexpected confidence boost.
What’s your golden rule of parenting?
It’s really to spend quality time together with your children, even when you’re so busy with your career and have so many other things going on. My husband and I are always asking friends who’ve been married a long time and have several children for their advice—you know, they’ve been there and done that! They all say that when it comes to their children, they would have spent more quality time with them, instead of only being focused on their work. I think we’ve done a pretty good job with this. When we spend family time together, we try to get out and do fun things with them. We go on adventures all over Los Angeles! With children, they’re not going to remember the things you buy them, but the special times you’ve had together.
Describe your best moment of parenting so far.
Being a mother has released all of those insecurities that as women, we tend to carry around with us… like a little extra cellulite on your legs. When you’re a parent, in the big scheme of things, who cares? My new focus is the joy that I feel with my children. It’s a joy you can’t describe. I’ve never experienced anything like this before in my life. It’s a joy from the depths of my soul.
And the worst?
The guilt that you feel when you try your best, but it still doesn’t feel like enough. Everyone asks, how do you balance it all? I don’t have that answer. You want to be able to give your all to everybody—your children, your husband, your friends, your work. Sometimes you fall short, and that’s when the guilt kicks in. The hardest thing is not being able to be there for everybody all the time. I don’t know any other mom who has this figured out either. It’s a constant struggle.
Best advice you ever got?
I had a lot of anxiety after the birth of my first child because it felt like, OK, you have no more excuses, you’re not carrying the baby anymore, time to get back to it! Answer all your emails, take that phone call, and go right back to that busy schedule. However, I was lucky enough to have a friend who told me straight out, the most important thing right now is caring for your baby, so sit down in that chair, nurse your baby, enjoy your baby and understand there is a time for everything—and this is time for the baby! After this conversation, I felt like the load had been lifted.
What’s the one thing you can’t live without?
My husband. We’re a team! I have such admiration for single moms, and I always think about what Hillary Clinton talked years ago, about how it takes a village to raise a child. It really does! We have a lot family members who help us out now that we’re both working. But my husband and I really are a team, and it takes the both of us to take care of our family. It would be really tough to be a single parent and have all that pressure on you. I am extremely grateful to have the support that I do.
Finish this sentence: You know you’re in the baby zone when…
… I hear myself talking to my children and I think to myself, oh my gosh, I have completely and totally turned into my mother!
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