Need A Friend? 7 Places To Connect With Other New Moms
Looking for someone to bond with other poopy diapers and lack of sleep? Here are 7 places to connect with other new moms.
Photo Credit: istock
New Mom/Postpartum Support Group
My first attempt to make mom friends came in the form of attending the support group for new/postpartum moms offered through our pediatrician’s office. I wasn’t sure what to expect. Would we sit in a circle and introduce ourselves using only our first names? Would we learn 12 steps to being better moms? Nope! It was part mix and mingle with snacks and sparkling grape juice and part sitting in a group (I noticed we actually formed a square) with a nurse practitioner there to answer our questions.
Did I make friends? Score! I met Anne, my first official mom friend. Within a few minutes of talking to each other, we realized had both given birth at the same hospital on the same day. It was kismet.
Photo Credit: istock
At the Bookstore
When our eyes locked as we both reached for the new Eric Carle book at the same time, I knew I had found my mom soulmate. Okay, so maybe I was spit-cleaning my baby’s pacifier and she was wiping spit up off her shoe when we almost tripped over each other in the Barnes & Noble children’s section. But, whatever! After apologizing to each other for our mutual clumsiness, we ended up finding out that we both collect picture books, both aspire to write children’s books, and both have babies the same age. What are the odds?
Did I make friends? Yes, one of my best friends to this day, actually. The children’s section of the bookstore can be a good place to meet book-loving moms, but the moral of the story is this: if you have a particular interest or passion, try finding other moms through a common interest.
What was that sound? After my maternity leave ended and I went back to my job teaching at a large middle school in suburban Boston, I heard the unmistakable whooshing sound of a breast pump one day as I walked by a closed classroom door on my break. I circled back another time when the door was open and there I met Amy, who was a newly hired teacher that year with a new baby she was pumping milk for every chance she got.
Did I make friends? Score! Amy and I successfully requested that part of the old home-ec room be turned into a private room for pumping moms. In the process, we discovered that two other staff members were also pumping. Talk about instant mom friends!
Photo Credit: istock
Places of Worship
When we visited my parents over the holidays, we all went to church together. I nursed my baby before we left, but within minutes of setting foot in the building, she was in full hungry cry mode. I was going to duck out to go back to the car when a very sweet elderly woman came up behind me and whispered in my ear that there was a “mothers’ room” right next to the sanctuary. It was a little room with a changing table fully stocked with diapers and wipes, super comfy gliders with foot rests, a tray full of snacks, a small play area, and a video monitor piping in the service. Um, was this new mom heaven?
Did I make friends? Score! The mom who plopped down next to me about halfway through the service was someone I knew from high school. We were never really friends back in the day, but within 20 minutes of swapping leaky boob stories, we were bonded for life.
Photo Credit: Led2Life/Wikimedia
In the Neighborhood
It was a cold, gray spring morning when I saw it. With my baby snug and warm in her stroller, I walked by the big white house a few streets over and there it was…the flickering light of a TV visible through the front window. Trying my best not to gawk, I could see just enough to tell what the show was. The Wiggles! My neighborhood had seemed devoid of children — and devoid of people home during the workday — so this was a definite glimmer of hope. I added this street to my route and by the time the tulips came up that year, I was on a first name basis with Nan and her 18-month old granddaughter Sophie. The house belonged to Nan’s son and her daughter-in-law who both worked during the day. Nan provided child care.
Did I make friends? Score! Not only did we become friends with Nan and Sophie, but we also became friends with Bill and Renee, Sophie’s parents. Plus, Nan even watched my baby for me a few mornings when I had doctor’s appointments.
Story Hour at the Library
Okay, so my five-month old wasn’t ready yet to sit “criss cross applesauce” on the floor and listen to the librarian read Curious George. But I was! With my daughter sleeping soundly in her stroller (story time coincided with her nap time), I sat through week after week of the various antics of George and the Man with the Yellow Hat all in the name of the 20 or so minutes after story time when the moms, dads, and other caregivers in attendance would chat together while the kids picked out books.
Did I make friends? A few, but they tended to be my “library buddy moms” that I would just see there. Still, a library mom friend is better than no mom friend at all!
Photo Credit: J. Brown
At the Playground
As soon as my baby could sit up well on her own, we began going on short forays to the playground. I quickly realized that the playground is like the Grand Central Station of new mom meeting places. All day long, it’s a constant coming and going of caregivers and kids. Rush hour is definitely right around 11 am, when it can be difficult to find a free swing.
Did I make friends? I made many acquaintances who I knew would be good for an extra band-aid or juice box if we needed one. All in all, I think I was too focused on my daughter’s sudden interest in climbing the monkey bars to really do any mom bonding. I definitely saw other moms getting lucky, though, so maybe you will too!
YOU MIGHT BE INTERESTED IN