How to Spot a New Mom: 11 Tell-Tale Signs
From a distance, it's hard to spot a mom to a new baby. If she doesn't have her baby in tow, you wouldn't immediately assume she has one. You could assume she was a vibrant, energetic woman who doesn't have a new baby at home. If you look closely and know what to look for, though, you can become an expert at new mom spotting. It's kind of like being able to pick a special agent out of a crowd—a hormonal special agent, who may be lactating. Here are some things to look for.
From a distance, she looks like any other happy person. She is smiling. She has a look of confidence on her face. She may even have a pep in her step. You can almost hear the soundtrack to her stride, “I’m walking on sunshine, yeahhhehhh.” But wait. Take a closer look.
There Is Unidentifiable Wetness on Her Leg
Zoom in on her thigh or any other part of her clothing. There will be stains, and or lingering wetness. Has it dried to a white color? Spit up. Is it coagulated? Vomit. Is it clear and still wet? Urine. The type of stain or wetness will vary. But the source will always be the same. Her sweet, adorable BABY.
Photo Credit: Tomas Castelazo
Her Skin Is Dehydrated.
She’s been breastfeeding a baby. The baby and the sleepless nights have sucked her skin dry.
Her Make Up Was Done in a Hurry.
The worst part is that no one has the heart to tell her.
Her Feet Show Traces of a Pedicure
A close look at her feet will reveal 1. her “me time” triage does not include pedicures, but rather, sleep, bathroom breaks, or staring at the wall for 20 minutes at a time. 2. she has forgotten she has toenails. 3. “she” has bunions.
She's Been Wearing the Same Jeans For the Past 4 Days
If you look closely, you will see that the jeans may not be as “fresh” as they looked from far away. They are stretched out at the knees and backside. They are dingy in color. Now you’re grossed out.
Look at that mom. She’s laughing. A big, hearty, guffaw. Like Julia Roberts, circa Pretty Woman, style laughing.
No, She's Crying.
You have a positive outlook on life, so you saw laughter. But, it was only a prelude to crying. Actually, sobbing. Her hormones are out of whack. Emotions are high. We don’t know why she’s crying.
She's Missing One Earring
She left home with two. Or did she? Chances are she either only put one earring in to begin with. Or, she doesn’t realize that one just came out on its own, and has fallen down her pants, which she’s been wearing for days. She’s oblivious, this one-earringed girl.
There's Debris in Her Hair
It might be carpet lint. It might be food. It might be a baby pacifier.
Though She's Smiling, Her Eyes Are Telling You There's Something on Her Mind.
Her smile is saying, “Good Day Sir”, but her eyes are saying, “I wonder if anyone knows my milk is letting down right now”, as she walks past a frozen yogurt shop.”
YOU MIGHT BE INTERESTED IN