Are You a Shy Mom? Learn to Shed Your Shell
Motherhood comes with all sorts of new challenges, from learning to care for your newborn to dealing with postpartum emotions, feeding obstacles, and lack of sleep. One of the biggest challenges you might have is finding a support system of other moms as you grow into your new role as a mother.
Perhaps you held a full-time job before you had your child and now you’re working part-time. Maybe you’ve quit work altogether and are feeling alone and unsure, with no support other than your family. It’s important to find friends who can understand what you are going through and be there when insecurities arise. It’s also comforting to have mom friends who can share the joys you experience as a new mother.
Eight years ago, Kelly Vesey, of Newtown, Pennsylvania, was newly married and working two jobs in a city where she didn’t know anyone. Soon after, she became pregnant. When her daughter Shannon was born, Kelly was thrilled to be a new mom but didn’t know how or where to meet other moms. “I was feeling a bit unsure of myself in my new role, and a bit lonely. I needed advice and called a woman whose husband worked with mine, and whose son was a little older than Shannon. She put me in touch with a new mom’s group,” said Vesey, now a seasoned mother of three with another on the way. The group met every week, and many of the moms have remained close, while friendships have formed between the children as well.
If you tend to be shy, Jennifer Trannon, of Naperville, Illinois, recommends you ask a mother you’d like to befriend specific questions about her child. “Ask how old she is or where she found that cute dress,” said Trannon, who is a mother of three. “Women love to talk about their children and it’s a good ice-breaker. Then, if there’s a connection, the conversation will keep going on to other things.”
Start a Hobby
Participating in a hobby you enjoy will also give you the opportunity to meet others who already have something in common with you. Try a yoga class, scrapbooking, or join a book club. National organizations such as MOPS, Mothers & More or International MOMS Club also allow you to meet mothers in casual and friendly settings, while offering unique programs for moms and children.
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