The Marriage Challenge: Rules to Love By

It can be very difficult for your marriage to thrive if you spend all your time being "Mommy" and "Daddy." You need to spend regular time as "Husband" and "Wife." This doesn't mean you have to take a two-week vacation in Hawaii. (Although that might be nice, too!) Just take small daily snippets of time when you can enjoy uninterrupted conversation, or even just quiet companionship, without a baby on your hip, a child tugging your shirtsleeve, or a teenager begging for the car keys. A daily morning walk around the block or a shared cup of tea after all the children are in bed might work wonders to reconnect you to each other. And yes, it's quite fine to talk about your children when you're spending your time together, because, after all, your children are one of the most important connections you have in your relationship.

When you and your spouse regularly connect in a way that nurtures your relationship, you may find a renewed love between you, as well as a refreshed vigor that will allow you to be a better, more loving parent. You owe it to yourself—and to your kids—to nurture your relationship.

So take my challenge and use these ideas for the next 30 days. And watch your marriage take on a whole new glow.

Parts of this article are excerpted with permission by New Harbinger Publications, Inc. and by McGraw-Hill/Contemporary from books by Elizabeth Pantley: Kid Cooperation and Hidden Messages