Pregnancy and the Single Mom: A Joyful Challenge
After an amicable divorce from her husband of seven years, Traci decided to try and fulfill her dream. With no solid prospects on the horizon, she took matters into her own hands. She was able to become pregnant a number of times but, unfortunately, all of Traci’s pregnancies have ended in miscarriage. And, although she admits that her view of solo parenting means “tough work, lack of sleep, no other parent to take care of the child, and expensive daycare,” Traci is still hoping to hold a new baby in her arms one day, whether she’s single or not.
Amy (not her real name), a 32-year-old single mom living in Toronto, Ontario, with her 12-month-old daughter, is also divorced. “Single parenting is no more challenging than I originally thought. At least now I don’t have to worry about [my child's father] and fighting with him; I’m much happier now and my happiness transcends to my daughter as I’m better able to take care of her when I’m emotionally stable.”
However, many single parents do admit that there are some unique challenges to meet. “Due to the breakdown of the relationship with the father, [my daughter and I] had to move to a much smaller home, thus my daughter’s space to crawl and walk is [limited],” says Amy.
Accentuate the Positive, Eliminate the Negative
Amy also mentions the stigma that’s still attached to single parents and single mothers in particular. “When it comes to sharing my status with people who don’t know me, I do feel a little odd. Usually if there is a mom, there’s a dad, and my daughter and I aren’t in that situation. I don’t let it faze me though: when people ask me how my husband does ‘this or that’ with my daughter, I just explain that we are not together.”
Danielle agrees that solo parenting can be a truly positive experience: “I feel that single parents have a closer bond to their children as there is no confusion on who has what role in the family. My son is polite, smart, and is full of kindness … he hasn’t missed anything in life by living with only me.”
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