11 Embarrassing Fertility Questions Answered

By Brette McWhorter Sember

11 Embarrassing Fertility Questions Answered

In this article:
1. Does having an orgasm help you to get pregnant?
2. Should I try to stop the sperm from leaking out after sex? For how long?
3. Are there any sexual practices we should avoid while trying to conceive? For example, is saliva harmful? Sex toys? Flavored lubricants?
4. Is there a sex position that's best for conceiving?
5. I think my husband masturbates sometimes. Should he stop while we're trying to conceive?
6. Do we have to have sex every day while I'm trying to get pregnant?
7. Is there a body type that's best for conceiving? I'm flat-chested and thin-hipped . . . are women with more curves more fertile?
8. Is it OK to diet while trying to get pregnant? Is it safe to cut out carbs?
9. My period isn't late yet, but I really feel like I'm pregnant. Am I crazy? How early can I do a home pregnancy test?
10. If I get my period regularly does that mean I'm ovulating and fertile?
11. My periods are usually very regular, but the last one was late. Could that mean I was pregnant and miscarried?

Trying to conceive is filled with embarrassing questions. Here are answers to several queries hopeful parents may be too bashful to ask.

Confession time. There are a lot of things I want to know about fertility that I've never been able to bring myself to ask. There are probably all sorts of crazy and outrageous questions that have occurred to you, too, which don't exactly spring to your lips when you're sitting in front of your doctor in a paper gown. Never fear though, because here are the answers to all the questions you've been dying to ask, but haven't.

1. Does having an orgasm help you to get pregnant?

In theory, an orgasm could help you get pregnant, but experts agree it's definitely not necessary. During an orgasm, the uterus contracts, causing a vacuum effect which could theoretically move sperm up into the uterus. But Sandra Gahn, co-author of The Infertility Companion: Hope and Help for Couples Facing Infertility points out, "There's a certain logic in this theory, yet while studies have shown such a vacuum effect exists, whether it actually brings about a higher pregnancy rate is unproven."

The key to getting pregnant is not having an orgasm (although it sure makes trying more fun), but timing intercourse to correspond with your fertile period. Trying to force yourself to have an orgasm every time is a recipe for disaster since the stress will not put you in the mood. If you do want to have an orgasm during intercourse, many women are not able to have an orgasm from intercourse alone, so added manual stimulation may help.

2. Should I try to stop the sperm from leaking out after sex? For how long?

After ejaculation, the fluid that carries sperm liquefies and most of it runs out. Your body can't use and doesn't need that fluid, so it's has to run out at some point. You may be worried that you're losing valuable sperm, but according to Dr. Michael Bohrer, MD, endocrinologist with Reproductive Medical Associates of New Jersey and former director of the IVF program at the Robert Wood Johnson Medical Center, "The vagina naturally slopes backwards and the majority of ejaculate will be retained."

Sperm are speedy and can make their way to the Fallopian tubes within five to 10 minutes of ejaculation. Many experts recommend lying on your back with a pillow under your hips for about 15 to 20 minutes after intercourse. The consensus is that it can't hurt and may help. But forget standing on your head—that won't do anything other than make you dizzy.