10 Best Things About Being Pregnant With a Royal Heir
Or, why Kate Middleton will have the best pregnancy ever
Unless you have been living under a rock the size of Kilimanjaro, you’ve heard the big news: Kate Middleton is pregnant! Yes, one of the ten-billion-and-two pregnancy rumors finally panned out. Although the poor Duchess of Cambridge is reportedly suffering from a nasty case of hyperemesis gravidarum, forcing her to rest in the hospital for a while, she and Prince William still have plenty to celebrate these days, including:
The Top 10 Best Things About Being Pregnant With a Royal Heir
10. Unique opportunity to make endless “The baby is crowning!” jokes.
9. Strangers aren’t as likely to touch your belly when you’re surrounded by a dozen gun-toting security guards.
8. Free daily maternity photo sessions, courtesy of the paparazzi.
7. Guaranteed laughter every time you sigh, “This pregnancy is a royal pain in the butt!”
6 Plenty of room in the private jet for your hospital overnight bag.
5. Whenever you are struck with a pregnancy craving at 3AM, a white-gloved footman will immediately fetch you a pint of Chunky Monkey.
4. No need for maternity muumuus when you can hide your bump under figure-flattering royal robes.
3. Nobody will impart parenting advice such as, “Now make sure your baby gets enough attention.”
2. You are the only one who can get away with calling Queen Elizabeth “great grandmum.”
1. First dibs on “Daddy’s Little Princess” or “Mommy’s Sweet Prince” onesies.
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