On the Eve of My Induction...
I never thought I'd be induced, yet at 41 weeks, that's exactly what's about to happen tomorrow. I feel like I'm on a roller coaster with my emotions right now.
I’m sitting here in complete shock. I’m 41 weeks pregnant. I assumed this happened to other people, and not me. I mean I went into labor two days before my due date with Abby, and had her super early in the morning the day before her due date. And with the chaos of her quick delivery and not feeling in control, I’ve been steadfast on taking more control of this childbirth. And now, I feel like everything is out of my control, which truly is a great metaphor for what happens when you become a parent. As I sit here typing this, I’m mentally preparing for induction tomorrow, and hoping that my chances of having a C-section are reduced as recent studies, and my OB suggest.
I’m such a mixed ball of emotions.I wanted to go into labor on my own. To be able to spend time in the comforts of my own home for the first part of labor. I’ve been sitting at 3cm and 50 percent effacement for three weeks now, feeling the pings of small contractions, thinking that at any moment labor would start. I’ve even had days where I’d feel those pings in a sort of regular pattern over an hour’s time, only to have them stop. It’s pretty safe to say I’m feeling defeated right now.
Today before my appointment, I got an NST (Non Stress Test). This is routine for when you are overdue. During this time they could see I was having contractions, yet I wasn’t feeling them. It’s kind of frustrating to know your body is sort of doing what it’s supposed to do, but not enough. The best part, though, was getting to hear baby sister’s heartbeat for a continuous 30 minutes, as I’ve been a ball of stress as she’s moving less the bigger she’s getting. See, happy and frustrated all at the same time.
When my doctor checked me, I for sure thought that I’d at least be at 4cm because of all those pings and Braxton Hicks. He said I was a “stretchable 4cm,” but he’s conservative and recorded my progress at 3cm. When I got to the hospital with my older daughter I had just reached 3cm after hours of laboring on my own. Part of me is happy that I’m already 3cm, the other part of me is frustrated. Still 3cm?!?!
I finally started reading more about induction a few days ago. I’d been avoiding it. I for sure thought I’d go into labor on my own. There are positive things to know about it, and then some scary things. So of course I had all the questions for my OB today. I was bummed when he said that he’d go straight to Pitocin for me. He said my cervix is already “ripe” so cervidil would be pointless, and he could try breaking my water and waiting two hours for labor to start, but with his experience Pitocin was still needed. The positive, though, was that waiting till I was 41 weeks to induce raised my chances of not having a C-section.
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