Work After Baby: Should You Stay Home or Should You Go Back?
What Will Other People Think?
Worry: I’m worried that if I stay home I’ll be seen as someone that is “having fun” all day when lounging or shopping, when in fact I’m working hard taking care of our children and our home.
What Moms Say: “Sometimes [my husband] makes comments about me getting to do what I want all day, and that can make me really mad. But on the weekends, after a few hours with the kids, he usually makes a comment like ‘I don’t know how you do this’,” says Brotnov.
What You Can Do: “I remind [my husband] how much work it is with the kids, and he usually apologizes,” says Brotnov. “I also cope with it by realizing that most days I really am getting to do what I want. I get to stay home with my kids, play with them, eat with them, take them to the park, and go on play dates with friends. I also get to talk on the phone to my friends and can occasionally take a nap when the babies are sleeping.”
Whether you and your partner decide that you should seek work outside the home or stay at home to raise your kids full time; this is a decision that shouldn’t be taken lightly. Author and creator of MojoMom.com, Dr. Amy Tiemann, PhD, has put a lot of time into this issue and says: “I encourage moms to be prepared to take their careers into their own hands if necessary. Entrepreneurship is a strategy women can use to remain employed while raising a family.”
If you’re not into starting your own business, just think about what will make you happy and go for it. “I could have waited longer before finding a job, but working in a rural hospital offers so much variety and experience that I didn’t think I should pass it up,” says Schut.
For stay-at-home mom Brotnov, this decision came after she had been working, “I feel it’s best for babies to be with their mommies and also better for your marriage; that way on the weekends you can relax together and not spend all your time running around doing errands and shopping.”
With financial consideration, agreement between partners and family and the support of your extended family, hopefully you will come to a conclusion that everyone can be happy with. When mom is happy, all is well with the world.
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