5 Reasons My Toddler Would Make a Bad Politician
Perhaps one day my daughter will rise up and be a great leader, a politician, honest and just—the voice of the people. But for now, she doesn't care so much about "the people," as she cares about doing whatever it takes to get another juice box, and to not go to bed. Here are six reasons why my 18-month-old daughter would make a terrible politician.
She Accepts Bribes
As much as she seems to be dedicated to her agenda, you give her a blueberry muffin or a chocolate scone and she’s totally off agenda and on board with whatever it is you need her to do.
She Has No Loyalties
So you two have spent months exchanging kisses, playing with her play kitchen, and reading books about giraffes for hours. You’ve spent endless hours giggling, snuggling, and sharing many other precious moments together. Special moments between parent and child. She’s your world, and you hers. Until someone comes in offering her gummy worms and a musical Elmo flashlight, then she’s like, “I never liked those books about giraffes, anyway.”
She wants it all to herself. All of it. Sharing power? Ha—let’s start with sharing her grapes, first.
She Doesn't Mean What She Says
My daughter says one thing, but means another. Sure, it’s mostly because she’s just learning to put words together, and she can’t say her “R”s yet, but still.
She Abuses Her Power
She uses her “cuteness” for personal gain. To get whatever she wants, whenever she wants it.
She Doesn't Listen to Her Constituents
And why should she? Her “constituents” (parents) vote for her no matter what she does.
Being a parent of a toddler is a trip. Sometimes those little, chubby-wristed humans are wild beasts thrashing about when they don't get their way, and other times, they are sweet, tender little things that come in for a cuddle and leave you melted on the ground. They are fun-loving, playful and ADORABLE, but be careful, they just might kick you in the face. Kind of like pygmy goats. Here are some things that are likely to become a part of normal, daily life for parents of toddlers.view gallery
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