Crashing the Party: Knowing When It's OK to Bring the Kids

Back 1  2 3 4 Next

Sometimes even the socially sensitive parent has a tough time figuring out when and where kids are truly welcome. A few tips can help parents decode what is kid-friendly versus adults-only.

Etiquette rules are harder to define than ever before—it can be tough enough to know how to dress for an event, let alone figure out whether bringing kids along is appropriate. "In the last decade, parents began taking kids everywhere with them, from restaurants to movie theaters—even on upscale vacations," says Stacy DeBroff, parenting expert, author, and frequent contributor on NBC's TODAY show.

However, just because you can take your kids along doesn't mean you should. Dragging a young child to an event that requires sitting still or being quiet sets him up to fail, and sets you up for embarrassment and unfriendly stares from those around you.

Part of being a kid is having fun, testing limits, and acting out. Most people don't expect children to behave perfectly in social settings; however, as a parent you can follow some easy clues to determine when it's OK to bring your child along and when it's best to hire a sitter and leave a little one at home.

Weddings and Parties

Weddings and parties usually include an invitation, which is your key to determining if it is an adults-only or child-friendly event. Pay attention to how the envelope is addressed. If it says "and family" or names your children specifically, you can be sure they are invited. If it is addressed to just you and your spouse, assume it is an adults-only function and either hire a sitter or politely decline the invite.

Time of day is another clue as to whether your child should tag along. Evening parties are not for those with an early bedtime. A child wreaking havoc on the ice sculpture or a toddler melting down on the dance floor is, at best, awkward entertainment—and at worst, a major and unappreciated disruption.

Tori Smith of Johnstown, Pennsylvania, is familiar with how unexpected party guests can put a damper on the night. Smith and three other couples hosted a swanky New Year's Eve party and were shocked when guests brought their 10-year-old child and his friends along for the festivities.